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Fictitious . . .
President [Top Gun] Bush has been offered a Hollywood contract to star in an action packed war movie. Hmmm? It's only a make believe world, cut out from a cardboard sea.
Now that's funny . . .
Dennis Miller has joined the comedy team of, Wolfowitz, Kristol and Pearl. [The 3 Amigos] After 911 Dennis became a 'born again' conservative. He reinvented himself and revitalized his lack luster career by memorizing a few key phrases; 911- Axis of evil - Lunatic dictators - Mushroom cloud- WMD - Liberal losers - UN sucks - France sucks - Germany sucks - Russia sucks - China sucks - Mexico sucks - Canada sucks - South America sucks - Asia sucks . . .
Watch for Dennis Miller at the Republican Convention on September 11th in New York City.
Republican family values . . .
The line is 8-5 Bill Bennett can explain them to you.
This just in . . .
American cigarette to rule Iraq. Yes, President Bush has appointed a Viceroy to be lord and master of the country. {:-)
You can quote him . . . .
"I don't think we can make the assumption that just because someone was in the Baath Party he is evil."
Major Mike Silverman, operations officer for the US Army 4th Infantry Division's 1st brigade in Iraq.
Automatic weapons . . .
Charlton Heston resigned from the NRA because he discovered President Bush is going to continue the ban on importing automatic weapons to America. Hmmm? Is President Bush becoming a Liberal loser? [:-)
Truth best satire . . .
To end sanctions President Bush must give UN a note stating Iraq has no WMD. /:-o
Guests at a recent Bush speech were told to take their ties off so they wouldn't look rich. [:-)
Stormy weather . . .
Want it to rain for a month? Buy an expensive pair of sunglasses. {:-)
Say What? . . .
GOP candidate for Governor of Mississippi, Harley Barbour loves the federal Head Start program but said, "some of these kids in it would be better off sitting on a piano bench at a whorehouse."
Poor Charlie Chessnuts
. . .
He was playing a game of chess in Forest Park, Queens, New York when he was handed a summons. "What's this for?" said Charlie. The cop replied, "Anyone who doesn't play the 'Sicilian Defense' against E4 is engaging in improper use of
chess pieces." [:-)
New alert . . .
Orange you glad we are not on red alert? Kate Smith's recording of 'God Bless America' does not justify the United States having preemptive strikes around the world. United Nations, for all your faults, I love you still.
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