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Why we invaded Iraq...............
Exxon Mobil, Shell, Total, BP are in the final stages of negotiations on contracts that will return them to Iraq 36 years after losing their oil concession to nationalization as Saddam Hussein rose to power. The no-bid contracts will service Iraq's largest oil fields.
Editor's note : Hello? Michael Moore working on F911 sequel. No Civil War in Iraq & Peter Pan is buried in Grant's tomb. The surge is working & Israel & John McCain don't want to bomb Iran. [:-[
Happy 4th of July...........
"May we never confuse honest dissent with disloyal subversion." - Dwight D. Eisenhower. "The right to speak my mind - out, that's America to me." - Frank Sinatra.
"So to me, to speak out and voice your opinion is probably the most American thing you can do." - Scott Fujita, linebacker, New Orleans Saints. [:-)
FBI program.............
It's called, "InfraGard." Do you know what it is about?
The Supreme Court.............
Ruled 5- 4, that prisoners held at Guantanamo Bay have a constitutional right to go to federal court to challenge their continued detention. Supreme Court Justice Anthony M. Kennedy ; "The laws and Constitution are designed to survive, and remain in force, in extraordinary times." The New York Times - "The ruling is a major victory for civil liberties - but a timely reminder of how fragile they are."
A new Supreme Court ruling, 5 - 4, says the Second Amendment guarantees an individual right to keep and bear arms. Hmm? In 1939, 8 Supreme Court Justices ruled that the Second Amendment does NOT guarantee an individual right to keep and bear arms. Soo, a total of 12 Supreme Court Justices ruled the Second Amendment does NOT guarantee an individual right to keep and bear arms and only 5 Supreme Court Justices ruled that the Second Amendment guarantees an individual right to keep and bear arms.
Editor's note : Hello? "Guns don't kill people, bullets kill people." [:-[
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Israel.............
Has announced they plan to build 1,300 new homes in the portion of Jerusalem that Palestinians claim for a capital of a future state. Secretary of State Condi Rice said such moves undermine the US backed, ' Road - Map - To - Peace.' Also, Israel talking about bombing Iran. Since we all know Israel has MANY nukes, why bomb Iran? [:-[
Lack of food safety..............
"The moral of this story is that failure to regulate effectively isn't just bad for consumers, it's bad for business. It's time to get back to the business of ensuring that American food is safe." - Paul Krugman, NYTimes.
American History 101...............
"Slavery By Another Name." By Douglas A. Blackman.
The re-enslavement of black Americans from the Civil War to WW2.
"Medical Apartheid : The Dark History of Medical Experimentation on Black Americans from Colonial to the present." By Harriet A. Wasington.
"Inheriting The Trade." By Thomas De Wolf. An honest look at slave-trading family's past. [Bristol, R.I.]
You may also want to read about black farmers who won a discrimination suit against the Federal Government, circa, 1998.
Clean, green machine.........
Honda's new zero - emission FCX Clarity uses a mix of hydrogen and oxygen to power its engine. [:-) [:-) [:-)
The meaning of...............
Globalization : "The wheelers & dealers of the world conspiring to enslave the working class."
Corporate Motto : "The cheaper the labor, the more obscene the profits." And you think unions suck? LOL.
This just in............
The National Snow and Ice Data Center tells us there's a good chance there won't be any ice on the North Pole this summer.
Editor's note : And we want to drill for new oil? LOL.
Weather...............
It was hot last week. How hot was it? It was soo hot, Maggie Moos melted. [:-o)
Note this..............
The price of a backscratcher has gone up. New backscratchers are insisting on health coverage. [:-0
You've Got Mail.............
Jerry - Is it ok to enjoy having rosy cheeks?
Signed - Massa Kist in De Sade.
Dear Massa Kist - Paddle this, red buns are your business. [:-o)
George Carlin dead @ 71............
For 50 years George tickled our funny bone. My tribute to the man ; And why do we call them, 'Rest Rooms'? Does anyone ever have to take, a wicked nap?
Around the world & up your block.........
*The Caribbean Monk seal is now extinct.
*The Hawaiian Monk seal is facing the same fate.
*Only 500 Mediterranean Monk seals left.
*About 70 Javan Rhinos still with us.
*Fewer than 1,000 Allen Cays Iguana survive.
*Giraffe numbers are down about 30% as their habitat dwindles.
* African Mountain gorillas are endangered.
Sprawl : To kill our wildlife & rape our wilderness. [:-[
My friend Sad Sam...........
Jerry - I tried to impress her with my country estate, but to her, it didn't manor. [:-o)
Two jocks chatting............
Jerry Satire : Are you disappointed you didn't make the Hacky Sack team?
Sad Sam : I can't kick. [:-0
Boating 2008.............
You know the price of fuel is high when captains are throwing their motors overboard & switching to, oar - power. [:-o)
New airline rules.............
If you are a senior citizen & plan to take your wife with you on the trip, you will be charged an additional - 'old bag' fee. [:-0
We're talking baseball.................
Whenever A-Rod visits Madonna, they just chat baseball & Hanky, Panky, Spanky. [:-o)
You know the honeymoon is over.........
When, every morning, the 20 year old wife, asks her 60 year old husband; "Are you dead yet?" [:-o)
This just in..........
Due to the high price of airline tickets, many folks are buying helium balloons & learning how to - go fly a kite. [:-0
My friend Sad Sam............
Jerry - I find I get a closer shave when I remove the plastic guard on the shaver. [:-0
My friend Sad Sam...........
Jerry - I should have been a farmer. I could Not grow food with the best of them. [:-o)
Amore - amore - amore...............
Jerry Satire : "Over the years, I made more than one women, moan & groan."
Sad Sam : "That's because you rolled over their toes with your wheelchair." [:-0
You've Got Mail..........
Jerry - Do you remember when $20 lasted more than a day? Signed - No Cents in North Central.
Dear No Cents - Those were the days my friend, we thought they'd never end. - Jerry in Lakewood.
You've Got Mail............
Jerry - Does John McCain want to cut social programs?
Signed - Not Sure in North Shore.
Dear Not Sure - Are clogs loud? Signed - Jerry in Lakewood.
Hope you visit.............
Think GREEN.
Demand National Health Care.
Support our unions.
Insist on new gun-ownership laws.
Conserve.
Recycle.
VOTE.
Love is funny, or it's sad, but beautiful.........
My TLC therapist is on vacation. [:-[
You've Got Mail...........
Jerry - Vacation? Think cold showers. Big Ed. [:-)
Best Wishes,
Jerry
JerrySatire@aol.com
www.Lampoon.net
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